i'm done first year! wahoooooo :)

April 12, 2002

i'm done! :)

after a ton of struggles, disappointments, joys, my first year is finally come to a close. it's gone by SO incredibly fast. like a blink of an eye. maybe it's cuz we get so much work to do, that time is all a blur. it's just project after project after project until you finish a semester.

in any case, i've learned a lot this past year. one of the greatest lessons God has really been teaching me, is basically to be nothing before Him every single day. to realize it's impossible to do ANYTHING on our own power, and that it's all about Him. i guess i really struggled with that, maybe i still do. i mean, to realize that you can't do anything on your own strength, and it's all about relying on Him. but you know what? what's so bad about that? God's strength is far MORE greater than ours. He's MORE than sufficient for us. He's MORE than enough for us. that's something i can bank my complete trust on. my Daddy in Heaven, who's always watching over me, guiding me along as i go. what matters to me, matters to Him, cuz i'm important to God! how COOL is that? yes, little insignificant me, matters to God :) the Almighty God. the Alpha and Omega. the Creator of this entire UNIVERSE. that blows me away. i think it will forever more blow me away. God's just that huge and amazing and it will take me a lifetime TRYING to figure it all out :)

God certainly completes what He intends to do. i've been telling everyone that and i always believed it. check out philippians 1. but it's so very true. despite all the struggles i've had this year, and my fear of failing first year, it didn't matter. God put me in this program and He would complete what He intended to do. that's what i was holding onto this year. that God would carry me though it all, no matter how bleaked things seemed! that didn't mean i didn't have to try. i tried my utmost best in my studies (something i've never ever done) to give glory to Him. that might have gotten confused at some points. that's one of my bad points. i think i want glory sometimes. it's not for me to receive. all glory and honor and praise goes to the only One that deserves it! i need to learn that. if any glory gets shifted onto me, i have to like redirect it unto Him :)

hmmm, i'd write some more, but i have an interview tomorrow! ack :) i finally get to meet the guy who i've been playing phone tag with for the past two weeks. i really hope this job works out, but i have no clue what's going on. all i know is that God will sort out my summer, He will make everything work. i just need to keep trusting in Him that He will do it :) cuz He will! so i go to bed a little bit excited, a little bit anxious, wondering what God has in store for tomorrow :)

Posted by Leo Chan at April 12, 2002 12:01 AM