weekend reflections
July 7, 2002
it seems like i haven't been writing as frequently as before.
and it is true, it hasn't been an everyday thing for the past few days. maybe because i don't feel like i've had anything really significant to write about? oh well, it's not a big deal!
so what's been going on with me lately?
i think one of the things i wanted to learn over the course of this summer was how to "fear God". pastor amy spoke about it this morning. and i guess to fear God seemed to be this really difficult thing to do, because fearing something implies this or that. but her points were pretty straightforward!
1. guard your tongue
2. guard your relationships
3. guard your walk
so like, fearing God is basically just watching what we do because by watching what we do, we understand our relationship with Him. it's not like an earth-shattering new concept for me, but sorta reaffirming things were buried in my head :)
immediately after church, we went to the molson indy. my dad got some like really expensive seats from some drug company as a "thank-you" gift. and although i don't like watching motor racing, i decided to go anyway cuz he had these VIP pit walk-through thing which seemed really cool and i don't get to hang out w/ my dad all too often. eric came too!
well, racing really isn't all that interesting, even when you are there. in fact i think it's even LESS interesting cuz you can't see all the action! it's just when the cars pass by where you are sitting. so i was kinda just sitting and thinking about things while the race was going on. i saw all these banners flying for different companies: dodge, molson, etc. and wouldn't it be so cool if everyone there was a believer, and the only banner flying was God's? i was thinking about how much our tickets costed. it was like $196.00. people would pay $196.00 to sit in a grandstand on one part of the track to see cars pass by every now and then. they'd sit in the uncomfortableness of a grandstand with the sun blazing on them and super loud molson indy cars racing by. they'd wait in traffic lines to find parking spots. all for what? to see a race that would end just as fast as it finished?
wouldn't it be cool if people would go through all that 'hassle' to just meet with God? if people would come, wait, and line up just to meet with the LIVING God? i think it'd be so awesome. one banner, God's flying over the city of toronto. that'd be so cool!
i had the privelege of leading worship for our 24/7 meeting tonight (with the core group). wow, it was just so awesome. how free everyone feels to go after God. it's just amazing! i was really encouraged by something a brother by the name of wayne said (he's really awesome). he was just commenting on what happens during our musical worship to God. that sometimes, we can't express a certain feeling or something, but the worship leader is the one that kinda expresses that feeling for them by a prayer, or Scripture or the approach to leading a song or what not. i never actually thought about it that way. that's pretty cool. and yeah, him and lillian just encouraged me that i did a good job. well, it's always a weird thing when people say that cuz to be honest i didn't do anything. it's all God. but i still appreciated it. :) i know i said this before, how prayer is kinda my way of worship now - but tonight, for the first time in a while was where i really felt that i met God in worship - and although there was no like 'emotional' response like crying, i felt Him. maybe now it's like musical worship & prayer are working that way - i think that's the way it's supposed to be. EVERYTHING that we do should be like that because we're worshipping Him with our lives!
wayne also was saying how satan goes after the leaders, because leaders always have followers and when the leader goes down, the followers disperse. i tend to forget that i am a leader in some regard. and that satan is going after me, tempting me with all these different things to bring me down. i need to watch my steps and watch for the pitfalls he lays before me. but you know what, it's all good cuz God has victory in the CROSS! :)
so yeah, lots things happened tonight. ben was talking about the whole concept of unity (like what louie has been talking about) and just kinda reaffirming that in our hearts. i think i'm totally coming onboard with that. i mean, we're all ONE family! i'd love to get to know the people that come better, just to see what God is doing in their lives and stuff. it's so awesome - God like does all this neat stuff in each of our lives. so cool. so cool. and andrew was just talking about worshipping God in all aspects of our lives, 24/7 - or his term, decompartimentalizing our lives. and yeah, i think that's the theme for me and the men's group this summer - i pray that God'll continue to help me to realize this in everything that i do, each and every single day. that He'll make me NOTHING before Him.
i really enjoy our sunday night meetings. it really is like the fellowship i've been seeking. and it kinda makes me sad to know it'll end come august 11, cuz august 10th will be over and done with. i know like jon and ben want this core group to continue some how, and i'd love to see it to, if God wills it :) i hope like i can find something like this when university resumes. maybe not on campus? maybe on campus? i have no idea. but that God'll put me in a place where the atmosphere is like these meetings. that'd be so awesome :)
i'm kinda long winded tonight, i guess. lotsa things to write about! :) but that'll be it for this entry. g'nite!
Posted by Leo Chan at July 7, 2002 11:54 PM
