reflecting on youth on a hill

June 22, 2002

it was raining pretty hardcore for the duration of the day.

i wondered what the youth on a hill ppl were thinking when they saw all of the rain.
to be honest, i was praying that they wouldn't be discouraged and whatever, cuz it was a big damper on their plans and i knew it could be discouraging. but i knew that God will make it all better. it really isn't that hard for Him, i mean really, He did create EVERYTHING, so to make rain stop is as easy as snapping His fingers. it's just a matter of that's His perogative or not. and i knew He would stop it. though i must admit, it was rainy pretty much up and until 6:45 pm (we went a little earlier to scope the grounds, get some food and we got completely drenched! like even the clothes under my jacket and tear-offs were soaked.. pretty jokes :P)

there were basically only two reasons why i went tonight:
a) to hear the vision from jesse & kathleen (and not all this hearsay stuff)
b) to hear the grade 12 dude speak

i've heard a lot about youth on a hill and their vision and all that stuff from all other sources BUT kathleen and jesse. but they didn't really go too deep into what they were planning to do and the vision and stuff. it was really vague. not too pointed. i was kinda disappointed, i thought there was more to it. i'm sure there is, but they didn't give the greatest explanation that one might hope for. or at least what i was expecting. whatever. not a big deal.

the other things in their schedule were fine, i suppose, but didn't captivate me too much. why? i'm getting way too old for these things. not to say that i'm getting to old for God, cuz that's not it at all. but just too old for things targeted towards youth. yeah, i'm not a youth. i'm like an adult, or a semi-adult (whatever - it's just a mere term - nothnig more), or something. jer and i were trying to tell sharon the difference between us being there and the average person. it was kinda hard to explain, but honestly. university really changes your perception on things, and it changes really fast. at least it did for me. it's not like i look at high schoolers and the youngins as 'lower' than me, but i do them as high schoolers. and that's not to generalize them or limit them in anyway, but there's a significant difference between them and uni students and the older crowd. we think different. we act different. we know things differently. and that's because of time: with time, comes experience, and with experience comes wisdom.

eventually, matt wan, the grade 12 dude came out to speak. now i was kinda iffy on the whole thing. why would you get a grade 12 person to speak and NOT a pastor? it doesn't make sense. it still doesn't make sense to me even now. i don't know why! perhaps it was cuz he was a young person and for a young person to do such an incredible task is quite amazing. it truly was. this guy is one truly gifted person . he's got some amazing preaching abilities given to him obviously by God. good preacher, not a great teacher is what jer said. i agree. i don't really know what his main points were cuz he was all over the place. but aside from that, i think that God delivered an inspiring message to the youth of the GTA through him. it's pretty incredible to think that a person so very young can do such an amazing thing. but then, who am i to say that. i mean, God did use david against goliath. and david was quite the young guy. whatever God calls you to do, He will equip you to do His good work, no matter how old/young, how much you know/don't know - it doesn't matter. He'll equip you with everything you need to do the task. as long as you are willing, it's all good.

so i've kinda been having a hard time wrapping around my heart around the fact that the guy was only in grade 12 and already preaching and what have you. not that there's anything wrong with it. it's hard to explain. it's just that i worry that him doing what he did will set a precedent for young people to start 'preaching' at young ages without going to seminary and all that stuff. sure you don't have to go there to be a preacher or whatever, but there is a reason why they exist. there's a reason why this structure exists. perhaps it was human-made, but i don't think so. it makes sense for people to go to seminary if you're gonna be a minister. it really does!

however, though i may seem critical and whatever, i'm not. i think it was amazing. and it's awesome to see God use someone so young in such a large magnitude. he seemed to know a lot of Scripture and stuff. i don't know jack squat. maybe i should get a picture Bible or something. :) pictures help me read. hehe. yeah, i'm still a kid at heart, i can't help it. but i wish i could know the Bible more. why wish. i need to be pro-active. i guess i need to devote more time into reading the Bible aside from the chapter a day thing for devos.

when things were all said and done and all the youths were just making a joyful noise to God, i just looked up to the skies. man, i love how despite the fact that were so very puny and miniscule on this earth, God still knows us and we can still worship Him. i was staring at the moon and thinking. here we are on earth, and i'm looking at the moon. earth's just one little planet in the solar system which is located in the milky way galaxy. the milky way galaxy is only one among the millions of other galaxies in the universe. and the universe, well God made that - so He's that huge. but somehow, He knows us. He knows the very number of hairs on our heads, every single thought we think, every word that we say, every emotion that we feel . He knows all of that and He's soooooooooo huge. it's just awesome. i love that. the duality of God. the bigness, the powerfulness of Him and the intimacy of Him. this is probably going to be like on my mind forever. i love this truth. i really do.

i was watching the youth just worshipping God with all that they had. becoming undignified for the Lord, not caring what they were doing or how they were sounding, but just worshipping Him with everything they had. it's such a beautiful picture. that's what's heaven will look like. we'll just be there worshipping Him all day long, every day, for all of eternity. awesome. :)

well it's 3:34 am. it's SOMEWHAT late :P lol. i should sleep. need to plan worship stuff and help daddy move tomorrow.

God my prayer is that You would raise up this generation of young people to follow soley after You. that they would deny themselves and anything the world offers them each and every single day for the rest of their lives. let knowing You be what motivates them in their day-to-day and let them fall in love with You deeper and deeper every day. for Your Name's sake. amen.

Posted by Leo Chan at June 22, 2002 3:37 AM