too many expectations?

October 6, 2002

i woke up early this morning with eager anticipation for a great experience at bayview glen. i've heard great things about the church, so i was all jacked up about it.

we arrived there, and i expected it to be packed, but to my surprise it wasn't. by the time service started, it wasn't even completely full. there were still a lot of sitting area for people! i thought it to be strange. i mean, the man's church would have to be super full, if you think about it!

the worship was still pretty traditional. they had a worship band up there (no bass, but they had drums, keys, piano, guitar and a TRUMPET!), but the style they do is pretty like not for me. it's kinda like the older integrity stuff, which i thought was weird. i didn't even know any of the songs, except for show Your power. the rest of the ones, i was like what's going on here.

and the sermon, oh my. it wasn't even like a sermon. it was more like a lecture or something. perhaps it was just the topic that made things sour, but i really didn't get anything out of it. i was trying to keep a positive attitude throughout the entire thing, but a part of me wanted to leave, or just do something else - anything but listen to what he had to say. and it's not to say i know a lot or anything, but the content was so very dry! my brother had the same feelings, and perhaps to a greater extent.

service ended, and we both left disillusioned. i had prepped him for a great church, but it really wasn't! perhaps the 'man's church' changed drastically from the time that justin went. i trust justin. he said it was good. i believe him. that's why i went there! cuz i trust his judgement on churches and whatever. but yeah, it had to have changed. rocky dundas isn't even listed as a pastor for them anymore, so what's that all about?

anyhow, eric told me about this church called "the river" - basically it's like 4c, but caucassian so we decided to check it out. however, they weren't having a service today. they were doing this like fun day at a farm, so we went there cuz we wanted free food (come on, who am i to refuse FREE food?). and sure it was totally strange cuz we don't know anyone and we just show up for free food, but what can you do, it's FREE food! :P

i'm kinda curious though about their church. eric said it's pretty small, but the worship and sermon is really good, so we're gonna go back and check it out next week.

i really don't know what i'm looking for in a church. my 'ideal' would be like 7:22. that's sweet stuff! good worship, challenging message and some fellowship to boot. maybe in an idealistic world? i felt like God was just reminding me this morning that i wouldn't find a church like that.

so i'm more confused than ever. do i want to be at a big/med/small church? no clue. do i want to be at a multicultural/chinese church? not sure, more leaning towards a multicultural one, but what do i know?

what other churches are left on my list now?
- the river
- 4c
- unionville alliance
- agincourt pentecostal (why not? :)
- etcbc??? (chinese though... i dunno!!!!!!)

still looking, still searching. God'll lead me!

that's it for tonight. i have a ton of work to do! the next three days is going to be nuts. i need God to sustain me and lead me and help me, cuz i can't do it. no way, no how! can't do anything without Him. isn't that great? :) i can't. but HE CAN! amen!

Posted by Leo Chan at October 6, 2002 11:08 PM