"as long as we're doing it together"
July 19, 2006
i went out to dinner with my girlfriend's family (and semi-extended family) two sundays ago. it was the first time i met with most of them. when i sat down, her sister-in-law's younger brother started striking up a conversation with me. at one point, he asked us, "what do you guys enjoy doing the most together?" i thought about it for a second, looked at ann, turned back to him and said, "what we most enjoy doing is spending time with one another. it really doesn't matter what we're doing, as long as we're doing it together."
the next day, i reflected on what i had said to him. in relationships, we've all heard how men hate going to the malls with their girlfriends/wives or how women hate going to watch sporting events with their boyfriends/husbands. as i've thought more about that, i think that mentality arises out of selfishness. the focus is on the self: what are my desires, my wishes, my wants. it is definitely not out of love.
1 corinthians 13 is the well-known Biblical passage on love. v.4-5 [NIV, with emphasis added] says, "love is patient, love is kind. it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs."
i thought about what my relationship with the Lord was like. could i respond in the same way as i did about my girlfriend? could i say that it didn't matter what i was doing with the Lord, as long as we were doing it together? at this stage of my life, i think i can (though i am not perfect at this). if you asked me several years ago, i would have said no. i was still holding on too tightly to my own wants and desires. life was still very much about me, me, me.
let me ask you this: if someone were to ask you what you enjoyed doing the most together with God, what would you say? could you respond by saying, "it doesn't matter, as long as we're doing it together"? i think some Christians would have a hard time saying it. i'm sure you've heard Christians say phrases like, "God i'll do whatever you ask of me, just don't send me to _________ (insert name of a location in the world)" and "God, i'll do whatever you ask of me, just don't make me a ________ (insert profession here)." i know i've said these things when i was a younger.
do you know what the root of these are? you guessed it! it's selfishness. if we say that we love God, our actions, thoughts, words must reflect it. we must be willing to put aside our own desires, wants, ambitions, goals, dreams. otherwise, it is not love. luke 9:23 [NIV, with emphasis added], "then he said to them all: "if anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."
some of us have been led to believe that God is out to get us, that He's out to make our lives miserable. we're afraid of what He would have us do. these thoughts and feelings are a lie. God has only the best intentions in store for our lives—He knows what's best for us. jeremiah 29:11 [NIV], "for i know the plans i have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." God fashioned us and created us with a purpose. only the Creator knows what the created is for. the created only knows its' purpose in the hands of the Creator.
i hope and pray that all of us would reach a point in our relationship with the Lord where our will becomes His will and our desires become His desires. i pray we would be able to go and do whatever He asks of us without bitterness, grumbling or complaint. finally, i pray that our relationship with Him becomes freed from selfishness and deeply rooted in love.
Posted by Leo Chan at July 19, 2006 1:15 PM
